Victor vs. Victim Mentality

I'm sure most of you have heard of the contrast between a victor and a victim mentality. I'll be the first to admit that I too often succumb to a victim mentality, but it is something that I am arduously working on.

Let's backtrack a little bit. What's the difference between being a victor and being a victim?

Victors: take control of their life and emotions, view adversity as an opportunity to learn and grow, take action to make the world a better place, assume responsibility for their life

Victims: let emotions control them, view adversity as a reason to throw a fit and remain stagnant in the situation, complain about how awful the world is without doing anything about it, find someone/something to blame

Here's the thing: you get to choose every single day whether you want to be a victor or a victim. How awesome is that? Your attitude sets the tone for your day, not the circumstances that surround you. I make a conscious decision each morning to be in control of my emotions rather than letting them run the show. Do I succeed every day? Heck no. But I'm making an effort to be a victor.

I've found that my morning meditation helps me overcome any sort of victim mentality that creeps into my day. I'm more thankful, more aware, less stressed. 

Which will you choose: are you a victor or a victim?

xo, Jess

P.S. The inspiration for this post: I finished up my meditation yesterday morning and I walked into the kitchen to find a huge pile of dog poop. I was on a time crunch and had to eat breakfast and get ready to head out to class. I saw the poop and started wailing, "Ugh why did you do this to me, Buck?" (so dramatic, I know). Then I started laughing at myself for saying that - do I really think that Buck conspired against me, planning to drop a pile just to ruin my morning? NO. Homeboy just needed to go and so he went. Funny how crappy (literally) situations can really help shift your mentality to a more positive one :)



  1. Thank you, I needed this to be reaffirmed. It is an every day CHOICE and I must remember that.

  2. I seriously let this run me at work sometimes, like when someone does something the wrong way. "why do they do this to me?" I am learning more and more that I need to use it as a teaching moment not only for me but others as well. Great post!

  3. I love this! I feel like I am constantly saying "why me?" to myself when I know deep down that some things just happen and don't have anything to do with me. Moreover, I have it pretty good. Great post!


I love reading your encouraging words :)
Seriously...every comment makes my day a little brighter!
SO THANK YOU for being wonderful!

If you have a question or need a response, please don't hesitate to email me at

© Lovely Little Things | All rights reserved.
Blog Layout Created by pipdig